Category: Relationships

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“I promise to be KIND” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
K is for KIND

“I promise to be KIND and considerate of one another, be thoughtful of our feelings and needs and cultivate benevolence in our relationship.”

With this vow, we promise to always treat one another with kindness and be thoughtful and considerate to each other putting each other’s needs and feelings before our own.

What does the vow mean?

According to a dictionary, kindness is defined as the quality of being warm-hearted and considerate and humane and sympathetic. An act of kindness can be a simple thing, but it can be revolutionary in marriage since it is transformative. And though a simple thing we need strength and courage to show kindness.

Why do we need to be KIND towards one another for a healthy and happy marriage?

There’s no one thing that makes a marriage healthy and happy. But if I were to point out one major interpersonal skill that we require in a marriage to make it beautiful then it’s definitely going to kindness. Kindness is one attribute that’s a must in any marriage for it to be satisfying. Marriage is more about what you give than what you get. Being kind towards your partner harbours positive feelings in each other and propagates warmth and affection in the relationship.

Kindness doesn’t just mean being “nice” to each other. Our partners deserve every bit of our compassion and kindness considering the fact that we may not what they might be experiencing at work or at home. So the best we can do is being gentle towards them and offer kind and affectionate words. Kindness in words propagates confidence, but kindness in thinking and feeling propagates profoundness and love respectively.

So when I say “I promise to be kind” it also means that we are willing to be positive, affirming and compassionate about one another validating each other’s likes, feelings, and desires. Kindness also means being happy for your partner and being open about it.

Being kind doesn’t mean we are not allowed to have fights and arguments or have negative feelings. We don’t particularly have control over our feelings and reactions, but we sure do have control over our actions and how we choose to act upon our feelings. Being kind means you are willing to be considerate towards your partner and treat them with generosity. Also, an act of kindness is always remembered and acts as a buffer mitigating the feelings of hurt and anger and helping reestablish peace and harmony.

But we can never be kind to another person if we are not kind to ourselves. So, when I say “I promise to be kind” it also means that apart from being thoughtful of each other’s needs and desires, we are also willing to take good care of ourselves as well as treat ourselves with kindness and compassion. Being kind also means to treat them the way they want to be treated rather than the way we’d want to be treated.

A little kindness can go a long way and in marriage change the entire dynamics if we choose to add a little kindness to our everyday life. A smile when I offer coffee, a touch when I hand him lunch, appreciation on a nice shirt, a kiss when he leaves for office or greeting him with a smile when he’s back from office are some of the things I do on a daily basis as a way of showing affection towards Mr. Husband. I may not be able to control what he goes through the entire day, but I can certainly do my bit to help him get through the day. Our marriage is built with kindness and we have abundant kindness in our marriage.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet L. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet J here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 230

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“I promise JUSTNESS” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships1 Comment
J is for JUSTNESS

“I promise JUSTNESS and equality in our relationship, to be fair and to honour you as an individual besides our relationship.”

With this vow, we promise to always treat each other with fairness and justness and find a balance between individual needs as well as the needs of the relationship.

What does the vow mean?

If we go by the dictionary meaning, justness and equality mean free from favouritism or self-interest or bias or deception; conforming with established standards or rules. Equality means partners in a marriage see and treat each other as equals, with respect, taking into account each other’s needs, and supporting one another towards the achievement of a shared goal.

Why do we need JUSTNESS for a gratifying marriage?

Justness plays a very important role in our marriage. Nothing is more vital and gratifying in a marriage than seeing the marital union as fair and just. Though I believe in gender roles, I am all about gender equality and equality as partners in the relationship. But in our marriage more than equality, it’s about justness – it’s about how fairly we treat each other.

Justness in marriage is about understanding and working towards the needs of your spouse as an individual apart from the needs of the relationship. It means that in all fairness of the relationship the individual needs should not be ignored or disregarded.

So, when I say “I promise justness” it means I am willing to recognize and respect Mr. Husband’s needs besides addressing the needs of our relationship. It’s about working a balance between my needs, my partner’s needs and the needs of the relationship.

In our household, Mr. Husband is providing for the family while I am a stay-at-home mom and look after the baby. So, for us, the justness is more about equality through teamwork rather than equality through division. In our marriage, we find it just to do work together rather than assigning separate work to each. Mr. Husband is a very involved parent and apart from nursing, he has been helping in each and every baby chore. He doesn’t feel shy to help me out with the dishes and laundry as well while he also has to work 8-hour shifts at his office. If it wasn’t for the fair approach that we decided on before marriage,  I could have been struggling with dissatisfaction and resentment. So, “I promise justness” also means sharing goals and working at it together as a team to achieve it.

With justness in a marriage comes understanding and trust– understanding that your spouse is possibly doing all he can and trusting that whatever he is doing is for mutual good. And by cultivating the marital virtue of justness we are working to achieve more than just equality, we are progressing towards a more gratifying marriage on the common grounds of justness with mutual reciprocity of our ability to lovingly cooperate and adjust.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet K. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet I here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 248

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“I promise INTIMACY” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships1 Comment
I is for INTIMACY

“I promise INTIMACY not only physically but emotionally and spiritually as well reciprocating a sense of belongingness.”

With this vow, we promise to always reciprocate feelings of trust, emotional and physical closeness towards each other fostering a feeling of belonging together.

What does the vow mean?

A dictionary defines intimacy as closeness with a feeling of belonging together that is not particularly sexual but emotional and spiritual as well. Though intimacy can mean and involve sexual closeness too it is much more than just that. It means blending of hearts besides merging of bodies and being sexually intimate.

Why do we need INTIMACY for a satisfying marriage?

Intimacy in a marriage does majorly mean a sexual expression. If both the partners are able to express each other through sexual intimacy it does imply that they have attained a good level of intimacy in their relationship. But, marriage is meant to make two people one in all aspects, be it physical, emotional or spiritual. We generally talk of intimacy as being sexually intimate but it is not just about two bodies merging together, it has more to do with merging of two souls together. Intimacy allows us to “look into” each other’s soul fostering a feeling of belongingness.

So when I say “I promise intimacy” it means I am not just comfortable sharing that most special part of myself but it also means reaching that level of comfort in our relationship where I am emotionally close.

Intimacy in a marriage means letting your guards down and feeling vulnerable. Intimacy means that kind of closeness where you can express freely without reservations and feel accepted. So, “I promise intimacy” also means that I know you enough to see what you see, hear what you hear and feel what you feel. Intimacy means to know your spouse and be known in a manner that you may be able to complete each other’s sentences.

Intimacy is definitely a journey in itself which, undeniably, is a strong foundation to an everlasting and fulfilling marriage. In our marriage, we both are in our way of exploring our comfort level in our intimacy journey trying to build an everlasting relationship based on closeness, warmth, mutual trust, and reciprocity of intimacy.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet J. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet H here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 201

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“I promise to be HOPEFUL” – #BlogchatterA2Z 

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
H is for HOPEFUL

“I promise to be HOPEFUL for us for today and tomorrow and to see light at the end of the tunnel when probably there isn’t any and believe in endless possibilities.”

With this vow, we promise to always expect and wish to see a silver lining in every dark cloud and overcome our fears to convert them into undying trust in each other and our marriage.

What does the vow mean?

Hope is defined as earnest anticipation that comes with believing something good. Hope is a confident belief and a peaceful assurance that every dark cloud has a silver lining. Being hopeful means you have faith that belief that makes you trust in things trying and challenging times. Being hopeful means you are being optimistic and willing to look beyond the obvious.

Why do we need to be HOPEFUL for a fulfilling marriage?

Every marriage is challenging and complex, and there’s no denying that. We have had our share of ups and downs when everything seemed like falling apart. There have been challenging and trying times in our marriage when it seemed like it is not going to work. But soon we realized that when we chose to self-reflect in our marriage we could even transform the painful experiences into growth.

When I say “I promise to be hopeful” it means that rather than focus on the hurt, pain, and disappointment I am willing to concentrate and emphasize positive memories.

Hope is such a simple word but with profound meaning and can be just the right thing in difficult times. Hope stems from the faith and though we cannot see it hope still is the substance of what we believe. We believe in us and so we are willing to practice commitment through the challenges.

Our hope in our marriage is formed out of the image and desire of the life we want for us and the belief that we can have it if we work towards it. Being hopeful gives me the power to see our relationship in a new light of reassurance and to believe that there’s a window of opportunity with endless possibilities.

When I say “I promise to be hopeful” I mean I am willing to find ways to stay in love and stay married when it becomes easier to call it quits. Hope alone can mean the difference between giving up on something and hanging in there. Without faith, there is no hope, and without hope, there is no true faith.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet I. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet G here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 194

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“I promise to be GRATEFUL” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
G is for GRATEFUL

“I promise to be GRATEFUL for you for your love to me and count my blessings every single day.”

With this vow, we promise to always remember to be thankful and show gratitude to each other for the gifting our marriage has bestowed us with.

What does the vow mean?

Gratitude is the feeling of being thankful, showing appreciation and willingness to return the kindness. Gratitude is a skill that you cultivate to show how thankful you are for the things you have and radiate an optimistic and positive feeling.

Why do we need to be GRATEFUL to for loving marriage?

Gratitude is not only an essential component in a marriage that keeps couples bonded but it is also a positive indicator indicating how much a couple finds their marriage satisfying and fulfilling. When we truly feel the gratefulness for our spouse we get to experience appreciation and heartfelt awe for them. And feeling grateful towards your spouse showing that you respect and value them, and treasure them for their uniqueness is definitely beautiful.

So, when I say “I promise to be grateful” it means I am willing to express earnest thanks, show humility and let go of my ego to be able to cultivate more joy and bliss in our lives.

Feeling grateful towards each other for everything we do for us is without a doubt the key to our sparkling and healthy relationship. It is the most significant habit that we follow in our marriage as it enhances and illuminates the positive qualities in us strengthening and protecting our marriage. Feeling grateful is about choosing to see the abundance than the scarcity and bringing back those cherished memories of precious time spent together. In our marriage, we make it a practice to go down the memory lane every now and then experience again those positive emotions and satisfying interactions. And when we are committed to seeing and appreciating life’s gifts together it helps us broaden our perspectives and be able to better achieve our personal goals.

Mr. Husband is the best hands-on dad that I know of. He helps me with my household chores even after he has had a hectic day at work. I’m definitely grateful to him for it and couldn’t say him enough ‘thank yous’. So when I show gratitude towards him he becomes more confident making me feel more gracious which makes me more appreciative towards him. It’s like a loop. And what we have come to realize is that when we practice showing gratefulness towards each other during good times we tend to get buffered from the withering effects of bad times. Expressing gratefulness to each other is probably the best thing we can cultivate to foster happiness in our marriage because it makes us feel valued and respected helping us maintain an intimate bond.

So, when I say “I promise to be grateful” I mean that we are willing to further deepen our beautiful closeness by cultivating the feeling of gratitude in our marriage by the mutuality of giving and receiving.

Over the years, I have understood the essence of counting blessings and I mentally count my blessings each day to feel more positive, be connected to each other and achieve maximum satisfaction from our marriage.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet H. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet F here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 303

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“I promise to FORGIVE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships2 Comments
F is for FORGIVE

“I promise to FORGIVE and seek forgiveness and to always reach for you over my pride to hold and to heal you when you are hurt.”

With this vow, we promise to always reach out to each other over our pride and seek forgiveness if we have hurt, and grant forgiveness if we’ve been hurt allowing to heal and grow together.

What does the vow mean?

Forgiveness is a process that allows you to feel liberated by making you release anger and pain and allowing you to feel stronger and less vulnerable. Forgiveness is the very first step in any relationship that helps in moving forward and helps in healing and restoring as well as earning trust. Forgiveness is not only a gift of freedom that we choose to give ourselves but is also giving each other a healthy relationship unhampered by anger, hurt or resentment.

Why do we need to FORGIVE and seek forgiveness for a satisfying and fulfilling marriage?

Humans are prideful and egoistic beings. As humans, we are bound to make mistakes because to err is only human. Some mistakes we commit intentionally while some are totally unintended. And we are bound to hurt or be hurt. And in our marriage, we don’t even promise that we’ll never hurt each other because sometimes even the best intentions fall short.

I’ll tell you about the incident. It was Mr. Husband’s first birthday after marriage and we were living in different cities at the time. So I planned to surprise him by paying him a visit on his birthday. But when I reached there he did something which made me really disappointed in him. I was about to leave and return back feeling betrayed and hurt.

But what he did after was really unexpected. He literally begged me not to leave kneeling before me. He was really sorry and ashamed for what he had done and he started to cry asking for forgiveness. If you have ever seen your man cry for any reason you must know how it feels. And all I could do was hold him close and comfort him. We had both started to weep. His was because of the shame and fright that I might leave and mine was not because I was hurt but because I had never seen him broken like this before. He has always been a man of calm and composure. We stayed holding each other for very long – he weeping and asking for forgiveness and me comforting him. This moment has been forever etched in our memories. It was beyond magical. He sought forgiveness because he wanted this relationship more than anything and I granted him forgiveness to show my faith in him and our marriage. It is this kind of magical experience that makes forgiveness not only vital but also necessary in our marriage.

And we both felt that forgiveness was such a liberating act. I did feel extremely hurt for his actions but had I been festering my wounds holding on to the hurt it would have resulted in bitterness and ultimately, hatred. Rather I chose to let it go allowing both of us to heal and grow. Forgiveness is not the easiest of acts but the most liberating of all.

So when I say, “I promise to forgive” I mean I am willing to learn to forgive and ask for forgiveness to show faith in our marriage and keep it healthy allowing both of us to heal and grow and retain harmony.

Marriage needs forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you’re forgetting it or you can’t be hurt again. Forgiveness means that you are showing faith in the relationship to let things go and move forward with life. So when I say “I promise to forgive” it also means that we care enough for our relationship to give each other another chance by willing to get rid of the hurt, disappointment, and shame, breaking the cycle of bitterness and resentment and providing opportunities to move forward. Practicing forgiveness in our marriage allows us to bring peace of mind and satisfaction making us feel more connected.

We both have “fumbled” plenty of times in our marriage and it is natural and commonplace because not all days are rainbows and sunshine. We have plenty of misunderstandings, disagreements, and conflicts but we practice grace in our marriage and have learned to forgive allowing ourselves to keep bitterness away, mature in our faith and grow together. To grant forgiveness takes strength and so does accepting your fault and seeking forgiveness but it truly takes two forgivers for a happy marriage. And we are on that path already.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet G. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet E here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 180

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“I promise to EMPATHISE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
E is for EMPATHISE

“I promise to EMPATHISE and be better attuned to your feelings, perspectives, and experiences to develop a deeper connection and understanding.”

With this vow, we promise to develop a deeper connection and understanding of each others’ feelings by truly experiencing your emotions.

What does the vow mean?

Empathy is the ability to perceive the world through the eyes of another. It is the ability to understand the feelings and perspectives of another person by stepping into their shoes and guide our actions according to our understanding.

Why do we need to EMPATHISE with our spouse for a healthy and long-lasting relationship?

Empathy is rather an essential component of a successful relationship. When we show empathy the other person feels understood, valued and respected and we garner trust and likeness for ourselves. It is with empathy that we can tap into those genuine human connections and make the most out of our marriage.

Ours is an arranged marriage and we come from different backgrounds with different tastes and perspectives. But when we started empathising we started to be open about ourselves and started taking delight in each other. Empathy helped us bridge the divide between us made us appreciate each other and the life we have created together. It has deepened our marriage through a shared experience, perspective, and understanding.

Now, at six years and counting Mr. Husband and I have started taking each other for granted. Sometimes that’s a good thing because it shows the level of comfort we share in our relationship. But sometimes, when the things are assumed without actually being indicated or spoken about it hurts. So, “I promise to empathise” also means not only to be observant of each others’ feeling and but also to be aware of what’s behind that feeling. It is important to make each other feel welcome in our hearts by focussing on those strengths and qualities that we respect and honour in each other.

Motherhood has left me with some raw emotions. I’d be honest; there have been several times in my motherhood journey that I have found myself on the brink of depression. And if it wasn’t for Mr. Husband who empathised with me I started to feel understood. When he expressed empathy I felt that I was not just being heard, I felt I was listened to and understood and valued. And that is a great feeling. And when I felt I was valued I was willing to give what he wanted. That’s the power of empathy.

So when I say “I promise to empathise” it also means I shall cultivate compassion in my relationship which would help strengthen our bond more and value each other.

Empathising with each other has also been helped us to be non-judgmental of each other, stay calm during a conflict, being and rather look at things from each others’ perspective having attuned to each other.

So “I promise to empathise” also means that by developing fertile ground for empathy we are facilitating our marriage to grow and strengthen boosting positive regards, confidence, and trust in each other. And with empathy as an essential ingredient, we try to sail smoothly through our marriage.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet F. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet D here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 157

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“I promise to be DEVOTED” – #BlogchatterA2Z 

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
D for Devoted

“I promise to be DEVOTED and committed to you through both sunshine and the clouds and to continue to be passionate about us.”

With this vow, we promise to be fully dedicated to each other investing our full energy, love, desire, and loyalty into our relationship through the good parts and the bad alike. We promise to find things in each other that are worth fighting for, seeing them through and rediscovering them time and again.

What does the vow mean?

Devotion is defined as a strong feeling of ardent love and loyalty and that is why devotion is an essential virtue in a marriage. When you thought there was nothing quite as electrifying as falling in love you just came to realize that staying in love is more soul-satisfying. And that is what is achieved through devotion. Devotion is a direct reflection of the respect you have for your own ideas, vision, and well-being.

You need passion to burn the flame brightly but you need the devotion to keep it burning. Passion helps you start a relationship but it is devotion that makes you stay in the relationship and keeps you falling in love with the same person again and again.

Why do we need to be DEVOTED to our spouse for a successful marriage?

When we first met, though I found Mr. Husband a very decent man I still wasn’t keen on starting a relationship with him. On the other hand, he was very sure about me and said ‘yes’ the next day. I didn’t find him an interesting man initially but as we progressed in our relationship he started to grow on me. With time, I began recognizing the deeper and meaningful qualities he has. And slowly and gradually something changed in me and he started becoming more and more attractive to me. And before I could know I was madly in love with him. While it was love at first sight for him, it didn’t happen overnight for me. It took devotion – the time and emotions that Mr. Husband devoted to understanding me.

So, when I say “I promise to be devoted” it means I respect my man enough to be making a genuine effort to truly understand his dreams, his fears, and his desires and I am willing to let things unfold over time.

I strongly believe that being devoted to each other will help us achieve a lifetime of happiness. Why you ask? Because, the best relationships start with a passion but last because of devotion. Early in a relationship, it is very natural to feel “the high” as we feel excited and passionate to discover new things and have new experiences. But over time as the novelty begins to wear off and we start becoming more familiar with the person, the passion fizzles away.  It takes devotion to rediscover the passion that made them in the first place.

So, when I say “I promise to be devoted” I mean I am willing to continually rediscover those amazing shared experiences we once discovered out of passion and continue to stay in love. And by being devoted to each other’s dreams, aspirations and wellbeing we hope and wish to have a happy, successful and satisfying marriage.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet E. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet C here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 203

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“I promise to COMMUNICATE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
C is for COMMUNICATION

“I promise to COMMUNICATE fully, fearlessly and effectively not only to convey my feelings to you, but also to listen to yours and establish a better understanding.”

With this vow, we promise to establish a true understanding by not only voicing one’s own feelings, but also making sure to listen to what the other has to say, and be open-minded to see things from their perspective.

What does the vow mean?

The dictionary meaning of communication says it is the transfer of information from one person to another. But, communication in relationships and especially in marriage is much more than the transfer of information; it is how we interact and connect with people around us. Communication brings transparency in a relationship which helps build and strengthen the trust, confidence, and bonding between two people. And good communication means we respect our partner enough to be honest and true to them.

Relationships are built around communication and communication is very important in a healthy marriage. While relationships reflect how we are perceived and how we are valued, the way we communicate reflects the kind of relationship we hope to have.

How important it is to COMMUNICATE with your spouse for a healthy marriage?

Communication is very important in a marriage and the effectiveness of communication decides the quality of your relationship. We need to communicate to develop a better understanding and get connected to our spouses on a deeper level.

Communication without a doubt is the cornerstone of our loving marriage. It has been playing a crucial role in our relationship since the time we were engaged to be married. We were in a long distance relationship during our courtship period when we just used to talk on the phone. And our interest in each other mostly grew out of talking and sharing about things we were passionate about.

Importance of speaking in a relationship

It gives me a great sense of acceptance and validation having Mr. Husband taking a genuine interest when I share and discuss my feelings with him. In turn, it gives Mr. Husband a great sense of relief when I shape my feelings in words rather than keep him guessing or letting him assume. Isn’t that what marriage is all about – to understand and be understood?

So, when I say “I promise to communicate” it means that I shall honestly express myself clearly without holding back my emotions even if it is a negative emotion. In our marriage, there’s a place for negative emotions because negative emotions also make us the humans that we are until we convey and get them out. Burying negative emotions can lead to dissatisfaction and agony. But, if we voice our feelings we can discuss them out and solve it together.

Misunderstood communication leads to resentment in a relationship. But in our marriage, there’s no space for resentment and for that, we make sure to deliver our messages across very loud and clear. And just so that no scope of doubt remains we even practice a habit of reiterating and asking if the message has been conveyed the way it was meant to be.

Importance of listening in a relationship

Hearing is not the same as listening. Hearing is when you receive an audible sound and listening is when you pay close attention to it. Just as important as it is to express and convey your feelings to your partner it is equally important to listen to what your partner has to say about their feelings.

So, when I say “I promise to communicate” it also means that I am open and willing to seek understanding of what Mr. Husband has to say. It means I am willing to be attentive and present to the conversation, even though I might disagree with what he’s saying or even if I might have listened to it many times before.

Communication is definitely an important aspect of a healthy and satisfying marriage. Our marriage thrives on the open exchange of emotion, desires, and beliefs. And, honest and effective communication whether it be verbal, non-verbal, written or touch is what we practice in our marriage for it to be healthy and growing.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet D. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet B here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 397

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“I promise to BELIEVE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships5 Comments
B is for BELIEVE

“I promise to BELIEVE and have faith in us, me and our relationship, and to strengthen our confidence without reservations for whatever life hands us.”

With this vow, we promise to always believe in ourselves, each other, and our relationship. We promise to have and show confidence in each other to deal with whatever life hands us without any fear, apprehensions, and reservations and see our relationship as a place of comfort and a platform for growth.

What does the vow mean?

Belief is the secret magical ingredient that is a must for a healthy everlasting relationship and a good marriage. Belief is when you place your complete confidence and loyalty in someone. Belief is when you have deep faith in someone free from any doubts which have a positive influence on their self-esteem. When I say “I promise to believe” it means I have genuine and complete confidence in you and your actions without any fear and apprehensions.

Believing in our relationship and in our marriage is by far the greatest way we practice to make our lives better. And our willingness to believe that we are in the right relationship with the right person for all the right reasons is what makes us a happy couple who are blissfully married.

Why do we need to BELIEVE in the relationship for a healthy marriage?

Believe in yourself

The kind relationships we have with others are always mirrors reflecting the kind of relationship we have with ourselves. We can have a thriving relationship and a happy marriage only when we have a thriving relationship with ourselves. And it’s because we tend to reflect our own beliefs and faiths in the people who we are in relationships with.

People who are happy with themselves reflect that in their relationships as well. And the people who are happy can do this is because they have found their true identity, they believe in themselves and love their innermost being. And those who fail to find their true identity within themselves look upon others to define them, inviting unhappiness in their own lives as well as when in a relationship with others.

So when I say ‘I promise to believe” it also means that I am willing to believe in myself because I have realized that since the relationship I have with Mr. Husband will be mirroring the kind of relationship I have with myself I need to have a positive and healthy relationship with my own self.

There was a time when I was on my lowest self-esteem and had lost all sense of self-worth. That was the time when I was having a strained relationship with Mr. Husband. And it was only when Mr. Husband showed confidence and belief in me and our relationship, that I could overcome my fears and started gaining back my lost belief in myself. And it was then that loving me became admittedly easier, I started to develop back my confidence and also my ability to connect back meaningfully with Mr. Husband. A lot in our marriage depends on the belief that we have in each other.

Believe in the relationship

Relationships are perplexing in nature and marriage is the next level kind of relationship where we commit for our whole lives. So it does need to have some amount of belief, faith, and loyalty to keep it flourishing. When we say we believe in someone it fills them with confidence to do much better in their lives and this can help boost the happiness factor in the relationship.

Relationships are mirrors that reflect our own beliefs. So in our marriage, we promise not only to believe in each other and our relationship but to also believe in ourselves. And we also practice to show faith and boost confidence in each other when one loses it. Because in our marriage, we believe that it’s not only our duty to make ourselves happy, but it is also our duty to make each other happy. And with a strong belief in ourselves, each other and our relationship each day we are striving to find happiness and fulfilment in our marriage. So, yeah, if you ask that one secret ingredient that we add to our marriage is definitely “Belief”. Go ahead. Add a little more belief in your marriage. You might be surprised!

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet C. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet A here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 153