Tag: BlogchatterA2Z

“I promise INTIMACY” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships1 Comment
I is for INTIMACY

“I promise INTIMACY not only physically but emotionally and spiritually as well reciprocating a sense of belongingness.”

With this vow, we promise to always reciprocate feelings of trust, emotional and physical closeness towards each other fostering a feeling of belonging together.

What does the vow mean?

A dictionary defines intimacy as closeness with a feeling of belonging together that is not particularly sexual but emotional and spiritual as well. Though intimacy can mean and involve sexual closeness too it is much more than just that. It means blending of hearts besides merging of bodies and being sexually intimate.

Why do we need INTIMACY for a satisfying marriage?

Intimacy in a marriage does majorly mean a sexual expression. If both the partners are able to express each other through sexual intimacy it does imply that they have attained a good level of intimacy in their relationship. But, marriage is meant to make two people one in all aspects, be it physical, emotional or spiritual. We generally talk of intimacy as being sexually intimate but it is not just about two bodies merging together, it has more to do with merging of two souls together. Intimacy allows us to “look into” each other’s soul fostering a feeling of belongingness.

So when I say “I promise intimacy” it means I am not just comfortable sharing that most special part of myself but it also means reaching that level of comfort in our relationship where I am emotionally close.

Intimacy in a marriage means letting your guards down and feeling vulnerable. Intimacy means that kind of closeness where you can express freely without reservations and feel accepted. So, “I promise intimacy” also means that I know you enough to see what you see, hear what you hear and feel what you feel. Intimacy means to know your spouse and be known in a manner that you may be able to complete each other’s sentences.

Intimacy is definitely a journey in itself which, undeniably, is a strong foundation to an everlasting and fulfilling marriage. In our marriage, we both are in our way of exploring our comfort level in our intimacy journey trying to build an everlasting relationship based on closeness, warmth, mutual trust, and reciprocity of intimacy.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet J. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet H here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 200

“I promise to be HOPEFUL” – #BlogchatterA2Z 

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
H is for HOPEFUL

“I promise to be HOPEFUL for us for today and tomorrow and to see light at the end of the tunnel when probably there isn’t any and believe in endless possibilities.”

With this vow, we promise to always expect and wish to see a silver lining in every dark cloud and overcome our fears to convert them into undying trust in each other and our marriage.

What does the vow mean?

Hope is defined as earnest anticipation that comes with believing something good. Hope is a confident belief and a peaceful assurance that every dark cloud has a silver lining. Being hopeful means you have faith that belief that makes you trust in things trying and challenging times. Being hopeful means you are being optimistic and willing to look beyond the obvious.

Why do we need to be HOPEFUL for a fulfilling marriage?

Every marriage is challenging and complex, and there’s no denying that. We have had our share of ups and downs when everything seemed like falling apart. There have been challenging and trying times in our marriage when it seemed like it is not going to work. But soon we realized that when we chose to self-reflect in our marriage we could even transform the painful experiences into growth.

When I say “I promise to be hopeful” it means that rather than focus on the hurt, pain, and disappointment I am willing to concentrate and emphasize positive memories.

Hope is such a simple word but with profound meaning and can be just the right thing in difficult times. Hope stems from the faith and though we cannot see it hope still is the substance of what we believe. We believe in us and so we are willing to practice commitment through the challenges.

Our hope in our marriage is formed out of the image and desire of the life we want for us and the belief that we can have it if we work towards it. Being hopeful gives me the power to see our relationship in a new light of reassurance and to believe that there’s a window of opportunity with endless possibilities.

When I say “I promise to be hopeful” I mean I am willing to find ways to stay in love and stay married when it becomes easier to call it quits. Hope alone can mean the difference between giving up on something and hanging in there. Without faith, there is no hope, and without hope, there is no true faith.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet I. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet G here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 194

“I promise to be GRATEFUL” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
G is for GRATEFUL

“I promise to be GRATEFUL for you for your love to me and count my blessings every single day.”

With this vow, we promise to always remember to be thankful and show gratitude to each other for the gifting our marriage has bestowed us with.

What does the vow mean?

Gratitude is the feeling of being thankful, showing appreciation and willingness to return the kindness. Gratitude is a skill that you cultivate to show how thankful you are for the things you have and radiate an optimistic and positive feeling.

Why do we need to be GRATEFUL to for loving marriage?

Gratitude is not only an essential component in a marriage that keeps couples bonded but it is also a positive indicator indicating how much a couple finds their marriage satisfying and fulfilling. When we truly feel the gratefulness for our spouse we get to experience appreciation and heartfelt awe for them. And feeling grateful towards your spouse showing that you respect and value them, and treasure them for their uniqueness is definitely beautiful.

So, when I say “I promise to be grateful” it means I am willing to express earnest thanks, show humility and let go of my ego to be able to cultivate more joy and bliss in our lives.

Feeling grateful towards each other for everything we do for us is without a doubt the key to our sparkling and healthy relationship. It is the most significant habit that we follow in our marriage as it enhances and illuminates the positive qualities in us strengthening and protecting our marriage. Feeling grateful is about choosing to see the abundance than the scarcity and bringing back those cherished memories of precious time spent together. In our marriage, we make it a practice to go down the memory lane every now and then experience again those positive emotions and satisfying interactions. And when we are committed to seeing and appreciating life’s gifts together it helps us broaden our perspectives and be able to better achieve our personal goals.

Mr. Husband is the best hands-on dad that I know of. He helps me with my household chores even after he has had a hectic day at work. I’m definitely grateful to him for it and couldn’t say him enough ‘thank yous’. So when I show gratitude towards him he becomes more confident making me feel more gracious which makes me more appreciative towards him. It’s like a loop. And what we have come to realize is that when we practice showing gratefulness towards each other during good times we tend to get buffered from the withering effects of bad times. Expressing gratefulness to each other is probably the best thing we can cultivate to foster happiness in our marriage because it makes us feel valued and respected helping us maintain an intimate bond.

So, when I say “I promise to be grateful” I mean that we are willing to further deepen our beautiful closeness by cultivating the feeling of gratitude in our marriage by the mutuality of giving and receiving.

Over the years, I have understood the essence of counting blessings and I mentally count my blessings each day to feel more positive, be connected to each other and achieve maximum satisfaction from our marriage.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet H. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet F here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 303

“I promise to FORGIVE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships2 Comments
F is for FORGIVE

“I promise to FORGIVE and seek forgiveness and to always reach for you over my pride to hold and to heal you when you are hurt.”

With this vow, we promise to always reach out to each other over our pride and seek forgiveness if we have hurt, and grant forgiveness if we’ve been hurt allowing to heal and grow together.

What does the vow mean?

Forgiveness is a process that allows you to feel liberated by making you release anger and pain and allowing you to feel stronger and less vulnerable. Forgiveness is the very first step in any relationship that helps in moving forward and helps in healing and restoring as well as earning trust. Forgiveness is not only a gift of freedom that we choose to give ourselves but is also giving each other a healthy relationship unhampered by anger, hurt or resentment.

Why do we need to FORGIVE and seek forgiveness for a satisfying and fulfilling marriage?

Humans are prideful and egoistic beings. As humans, we are bound to make mistakes because to err is only human. Some mistakes we commit intentionally while some are totally unintended. And we are bound to hurt or be hurt. And in our marriage, we don’t even promise that we’ll never hurt each other because sometimes even the best intentions fall short.

I’ll tell you about the incident. It was Mr. Husband’s first birthday after marriage and we were living in different cities at the time. So I planned to surprise him by paying him a visit on his birthday. But when I reached there he did something which made me really disappointed in him. I was about to leave and return back feeling betrayed and hurt.

But what he did after was really unexpected. He literally begged me not to leave kneeling before me. He was really sorry and ashamed for what he had done and he started to cry asking for forgiveness. If you have ever seen your man cry for any reason you must know how it feels. And all I could do was hold him close and comfort him. We had both started to weep. His was because of the shame and fright that I might leave and mine was not because I was hurt but because I had never seen him broken like this before. He has always been a man of calm and composure. We stayed holding each other for very long – he weeping and asking for forgiveness and me comforting him. This moment has been forever etched in our memories. It was beyond magical. He sought forgiveness because he wanted this relationship more than anything and I granted him forgiveness to show my faith in him and our marriage. It is this kind of magical experience that makes forgiveness not only vital but also necessary in our marriage.

And we both felt that forgiveness was such a liberating act. I did feel extremely hurt for his actions but had I been festering my wounds holding on to the hurt it would have resulted in bitterness and ultimately, hatred. Rather I chose to let it go allowing both of us to heal and grow. Forgiveness is not the easiest of acts but the most liberating of all.

So when I say, “I promise to forgive” I mean I am willing to learn to forgive and ask for forgiveness to show faith in our marriage and keep it healthy allowing both of us to heal and grow and retain harmony.

Marriage needs forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you’re forgetting it or you can’t be hurt again. Forgiveness means that you are showing faith in the relationship to let things go and move forward with life. So when I say “I promise to forgive” it also means that we care enough for our relationship to give each other another chance by willing to get rid of the hurt, disappointment, and shame, breaking the cycle of bitterness and resentment and providing opportunities to move forward. Practicing forgiveness in our marriage allows us to bring peace of mind and satisfaction making us feel more connected.

We both have “fumbled” plenty of times in our marriage and it is natural and commonplace because not all days are rainbows and sunshine. We have plenty of misunderstandings, disagreements, and conflicts but we practice grace in our marriage and have learned to forgive allowing ourselves to keep bitterness away, mature in our faith and grow together. To grant forgiveness takes strength and so does accepting your fault and seeking forgiveness but it truly takes two forgivers for a happy marriage. And we are on that path already.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet G. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet E here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 180

“I promise to EMPATHISE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, RelationshipsLeave a comment
E is for EMPATHISE

“I promise to EMPATHISE and be better attuned to your feelings, perspectives, and experiences to develop a deeper connection and understanding.”

With this vow, we promise to develop a deeper connection and understanding of each others’ feelings by truly experiencing your emotions.

What does the vow mean?

Empathy is the ability to perceive the world through the eyes of another. It is the ability to understand the feelings and perspectives of another person by stepping into their shoes and guide our actions according to our understanding.

Why do we need to EMPATHISE with our spouse for a healthy and long-lasting relationship?

Empathy is rather an essential component of a successful relationship. When we show empathy the other person feels understood, valued and respected and we garner trust and likeness for ourselves. It is with empathy that we can tap into those genuine human connections and make the most out of our marriage.

Ours is an arranged marriage and we come from different backgrounds with different tastes and perspectives. But when we started empathising we started to be open about ourselves and started taking delight in each other. Empathy helped us bridge the divide between us made us appreciate each other and the life we have created together. It has deepened our marriage through a shared experience, perspective, and understanding.

Now, at six years and counting Mr. Husband and I have started taking each other for granted. Sometimes that’s a good thing because it shows the level of comfort we share in our relationship. But sometimes, when the things are assumed without actually being indicated or spoken about it hurts. So, “I promise to empathise” also means not only to be observant of each others’ feeling and but also to be aware of what’s behind that feeling. It is important to make each other feel welcome in our hearts by focussing on those strengths and qualities that we respect and honour in each other.

Motherhood has left me with some raw emotions. I’d be honest; there have been several times in my motherhood journey that I have found myself on the brink of depression. And if it wasn’t for Mr. Husband who empathised with me I started to feel understood. When he expressed empathy I felt that I was not just being heard, I felt I was listened to and understood and valued. And that is a great feeling. And when I felt I was valued I was willing to give what he wanted. That’s the power of empathy.

So when I say “I promise to empathise” it also means I shall cultivate compassion in my relationship which would help strengthen our bond more and value each other.

Empathising with each other has also been helped us to be non-judgmental of each other, stay calm during a conflict, being and rather look at things from each others’ perspective having attuned to each other.

So “I promise to empathise” also means that by developing fertile ground for empathy we are facilitating our marriage to grow and strengthen boosting positive regards, confidence, and trust in each other. And with empathy as an essential ingredient, we try to sail smoothly through our marriage.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet F. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet D here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 157

“I promise to BELIEVE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships5 Comments
B is for BELIEVE

“I promise to BELIEVE and have faith in us, me and our relationship, and to strengthen our confidence without reservations for whatever life hands us.”

With this vow, we promise to always believe in ourselves, each other, and our relationship. We promise to have and show confidence in each other to deal with whatever life hands us without any fear, apprehensions, and reservations and see our relationship as a place of comfort and a platform for growth.

What does the vow mean?

Belief is the secret magical ingredient that is a must for a healthy everlasting relationship and a good marriage. Belief is when you place your complete confidence and loyalty in someone. Belief is when you have deep faith in someone free from any doubts which have a positive influence on their self-esteem. When I say “I promise to believe” it means I have genuine and complete confidence in you and your actions without any fear and apprehensions.

Believing in our relationship and in our marriage is by far the greatest way we practice to make our lives better. And our willingness to believe that we are in the right relationship with the right person for all the right reasons is what makes us a happy couple who are blissfully married.

Why do we need to BELIEVE in the relationship for a healthy marriage?

Believe in yourself

The kind relationships we have with others are always mirrors reflecting the kind of relationship we have with ourselves. We can have a thriving relationship and a happy marriage only when we have a thriving relationship with ourselves. And it’s because we tend to reflect our own beliefs and faiths in the people who we are in relationships with.

People who are happy with themselves reflect that in their relationships as well. And the people who are happy can do this is because they have found their true identity, they believe in themselves and love their innermost being. And those who fail to find their true identity within themselves look upon others to define them, inviting unhappiness in their own lives as well as when in a relationship with others.

So when I say ‘I promise to believe” it also means that I am willing to believe in myself because I have realized that since the relationship I have with Mr. Husband will be mirroring the kind of relationship I have with myself I need to have a positive and healthy relationship with my own self.

There was a time when I was on my lowest self-esteem and had lost all sense of self-worth. That was the time when I was having a strained relationship with Mr. Husband. And it was only when Mr. Husband showed confidence and belief in me and our relationship, that I could overcome my fears and started gaining back my lost belief in myself. And it was then that loving me became admittedly easier, I started to develop back my confidence and also my ability to connect back meaningfully with Mr. Husband. A lot in our marriage depends on the belief that we have in each other.

Believe in the relationship

Relationships are perplexing in nature and marriage is the next level kind of relationship where we commit for our whole lives. So it does need to have some amount of belief, faith, and loyalty to keep it flourishing. When we say we believe in someone it fills them with confidence to do much better in their lives and this can help boost the happiness factor in the relationship.

Relationships are mirrors that reflect our own beliefs. So in our marriage, we promise not only to believe in each other and our relationship but to also believe in ourselves. And we also practice to show faith and boost confidence in each other when one loses it. Because in our marriage, we believe that it’s not only our duty to make ourselves happy, but it is also our duty to make each other happy. And with a strong belief in ourselves, each other and our relationship each day we are striving to find happiness and fulfilment in our marriage. So, yeah, if you ask that one secret ingredient that we add to our marriage is definitely “Belief”. Go ahead. Add a little more belief in your marriage. You might be surprised!

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet C. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here and the previous vow with alphabet A here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 152

“I promise to ADMIRE” – #BlogchatterA2Z

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships7 Comments
A is for ADMIRE

“I promise to ADMIRE and appreciate you for who you are, who you have been and who you wish to become.”

With this vow, we promise to always see the best in each other and support each other in our journey towards personal growth and self-improvement accepting all the forms of each other.

What does the vow mean?

The first part of the vow means:

If we go by the dictionary meaning of admiration, it says admiration is a feeling of delighted approval and liking. And so, admiration is one of the most powerful foundations for a long-lasting relationship. It is indeed a very strong first feeling you develop in a person you have known and you respect. Admiration has to do about the story you want to tell about your spouse to yourself. And, that means it should come straight from the heart. When I say “I promise to admire you” it means I have genuine respect for you which comes from the wonder, pleasure, and warmth I get in your company.

Admiration is, thus, the first positive feeling that makes us stick to our spouses because when all other emotions begin to fade away, only the best things that we see in our spouses makes us admire them.

The second part of the vow means:

Our past has a lot to do with who we are and who we have become. I have had my ups and downs, highs and lows, and successes and failures which have shaped me to be the person that I am today. To me, getting married always meant the ultimate acceptance of me from my partner, without any regrets, accepting me with open hearts and guiding me in our future with open arms. It has always been very important to me in our marriage that we both challenge each other and help each other grow to be a better person. Here, we don’t mean to improve the way the one wants the other to, but to improve in a way that one wants to improve herself for the mutual good.

Why do we need to ADMIRE our spouse for a healthy and long-lasting relationship?

When we are at the beginning of a relationship, during that rosy feeling of the butterflies-in-the-stomach kind, we usually tend to overlook all the negative habits in our partner which we begin to notice only when we have spent a considerable amount of time with them. And when we are past the all-is-roses phase, we suddenly begin to find those habits we once overlooked and didn’t mind about as unbearable and difficult to deal with. Marriage is choosing to see the best in you with all your heart and being reciprocated.

But it’s equally important for us to communicate and appreciate what we admire in our spouses. Mutual admiration is not only the foundation of a healthy marriage, but it is also a hallmark of a flourishing relationship. “I promise to admire” means I am ready to actively cultivate and focus on the positive in the one I deeply love.

But we need to understand that a relationship can only last when you try to focus on the good your partner has rather than ruminating about the bad. Nobody is perfect. Perfect is a lie. But still we can strive for a healthy relationship if we slightly change our outlook and that’s the image I hope to carry with me throughout my marriage. I hope as Mr. Husband and I grow in love, we continue to find unique ways to admire each other looking past our imperfections and helping each other to become the best version of ourselves. And this is how we vow to make each other happy and our relationship enjoyable.

Keep watching the space for the next vow with alphabet B. You can find the opening post to the vows “What marriage means to me?” here.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 286

BlogchatterA2Z Challenge 2019 – Theme Reveal

On By Sweta KachhapIn Blogchatter Projects, Relationships4 Comments
“Marriage Rededicated” is my theme for BlogchatterA2Z

Hello Readers!

March was fun with three posts in a week on Women’s Day. But April is going to be extra fun. I’m excited to share that my one-year wait has finally come to an end and I’m finally participating in the crazy BlogchatterA2Z Blogging Challenge.

Why crazy?

Because I need to post 26 posts in a single month. Can you imagine the madness? I posted a total of 30 posts in the last year that I have been blogging, and now I need to post a similar number in just a month. Whaaatttt??? That’s crazy, right? But you know what, I’m crazier, and I’m determined to complete the challenge whatever it takes.

BlogchatterA2Z Blogging Challenge

If you are wondering what BlogchatterA2Z challenge is, let me tell you it is an exciting and thrilling, action-and-drama-packed, month-long blogging challenge where the participant needs to put up 26 posts with 26 alphabets in 26 days (Sundays being a holiday). The posts can be a part of a theme or individual posts depending on the participant’s choice.

So, with that being said I have chosen to stick to a theme for myself to give a feel, connect and solidarity to my posts, something that my readers can look forward to reading each day throughout the month. And now, it’s time for the “Theme Reveal” and I can already sense the adrenaline gushing in me, that’s the kind of excitement BlogchatterA2Z challenge entails and is raved about. Excited much?

Theme Reveal

The theme that I have chosen for the challenge is “Marriage Rededicated”. Yes, that’s the theme I choose for the challenge. Having been known each other for 6 years of marriage plus 6 months of courtship we have started to take each other for granted. With Shaarav in our lives, we hardly take time to appreciate each other. We both take very highly of our marriage and we just want to appreciate, cherish and invest in it a little more than we already do. We wish to give our marriage an extra shine with a little extra polish. And to add that extra shine, I suggested it’s time we renewed our marriage vows, but with a slight twist. Also, I did not want to wait for a landmark anniversary or veritable lifetime to pass before I did this. It’s time we celebrated our marriage and reaffirmed our commitment towards the person we would like to spend an eternity with. So, join me as we renew our marriage vows by taking not 7, but 26 vows through alphabets A to Z with #MarriageRededicated. Exciting, right?

With these 26 vows from 26 alphabets spread across 26 posts through BlogchatterA2Z, I wish to redefine our marriage. With this challenge, I should also be able to set new relationship goals for us and also add a little extra shine to our already shining marriage. This April should be special as I celebrate and cherish our marriage with a new vow each day. Keep watching this space starting 1st of April’ 2019 as I rededicate my marriage vows, or even better you too could with me.

Love,

Mrs. Sunshine

Views: 481