I’m OK with not being perfect, and that’s perfect to me!

I’m okay with not being perfect, and that’s perfect to me!

In the previous post I talked about how I might be a “work in progress” but still, “I love me.” In this post, let’s talk about how I came to appreciate who I am and what I am and why I’m OK with not being perfect, and that’s perfect to me!

I was this super skinny girl, both literally and figuratively, throughout my preteen years right until I got married. I started putting on weight only after I got married and during my pregnancy, I put on some 20 kilos. And although all the baby weight I had gained went away the way it came, the stubborn abdominal fat stayed behind and refuses to go away. So if you ask me what shape I am now, I’m clueless myself. Because I used to be a perfect size M but now I’m somewhere between a size M and L as M feels a bit smaller while L is too large.

Body image is a mental representation that we create for our body compared to the standards set by the society, disregard of how others perceive us. Body image, whether positive or negative can play a vital role in a person’s mental and physical well-being. And depending on the type of body image a person has for oneself, it can either conjure feelings of security, love, and value (positive body image) or inflict feelings of shame and self-pity (negative body image).

I was once a typical case of a person with a sense of negative body image. During my skinny years, even the rudest people who made mean and snide remarks could never make me feel low, discouraged or demoralized. But when you make harsh comments about your own body, by saying it out loud or by even thinking it, it hurts your self-esteem more and it hurts just as much as if when somebody else said it. So, it was me who admonished my own body because I couldn’t wear a certain type of clothes I’d like to wear. I won’t say I was ashamed of my body, but I felt very self-conscious and insecure about it for a really long time. It was my own disoriented view of the aesthetics of my body which filled me with dissatisfaction, made me feel disheartened and lowered my self-esteem.

Our society has placed inordinate value on the beauty of the human body since time immemorial. And, we’ve been brought up in a society where we are conditioned to believe a certain body shape to be perfect. And the cherry on the cake is the digital media, which have been flooding the world with such highly stylized and unrealistic appearance ideals, creating a very flawed concept of “perfect.” The high cultural expectation from this unobtainable “perfect” that has been fabricated in our society has been leading to a lot of discontentment and insecurities in people like me who lack it.

But not long ago, I stumbled upon this beautiful song “Perfect” by Anne Marie with a very powerful message of self-acceptance and it made me realize that I’m OK with not being perfect, and that’s perfect to me!

I realized that I don’t need a perfect body to feel perfect. I needed to like my body to feel perfect. And when rather than fixating on body negativity I started focussing on body positivity I had a clear true perception of my body and it was then I began to respect, appreciate and celebrate my body.

Why do we need somebody else’s approval for our own body? Aren’t we unique because of our imperfections? The ode to self-love is all about loving our imperfections. That’s what makes us perfect, right. And, I’m OK with not being perfect, and that’s perfect to me!

This post is a part of the #UnapologeticGirlz Blogathon Train hosted by PreetjyotJasmeet, and Charu. It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers are celebrating Women’s Day with a twist. I would like to thank Ravijot Kaur for introducing me. Ravijot is a strong single mother who is courageously raising her daughter. She shares the journey of her life with multifarious interests at Shining Shower. Read her take on the prompt “Body positivity” here. I would like to introduce Revati Bhushan. A fellow stay-at-home mom she was a Soft Skills Trainer in the corporate world when motherhood happened. She now shares her parenting journey at Mommy Musings. I’m sure you will enjoy reading her take on the prompt here. Please check out other wonderful posts on the theme by other boarders as well. Here comes the train! Choo Choo!


Mrs. Sunshine

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Three days, Three Quotes: Day 1

Discovering My True Self

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. – Oscar Wilde

This is a very famous quote by the very famous Irish author and poet Oscar Wilde. Over the years, the quote has inspired many souls and I also couldn’t remain untouched by its deeper meaning.

What does the quote mean to me?

To me, it means identifying and expressing my individuality and uniqueness. It means believing in my originality and authenticity. Rather than trying to fit in and becoming a blind follower of the herd, it means representing my own style, opinion and character. Because knowing and believing in myself gave me freedom and courage and a true perception of who I really am.

There was a point in my life when I had lost all sense of self-worth and didn’t value myself. I constantly sought acceptance and approval of somebody for the most trivial things. I was at my lowest best and I had begun to harbour negative emotions, not for anybody else but for myself.

What did the quote give me?

When I started introspecting I became very vulnerable to my own thoughts and feelings. The guards which I had been putting up for so long were suddenly brought down. This quote made me confront with my own unknown and unfathomed emotions enlightening those uncharted regions of my heart. And I had to face my own deepest fears and apprehensions. But, when I came to acknowledge those unsounded emotions, I felt the power to transform those fears into something more positive and more creative. It helped me to contemplate and express myself without any reservation leaving me feeling empowered.

It gave me a world of freedom – freedom of thoughts, freedom of expression and freedom of personality. It gave me a sense of liberation from hypocrisy. It gave me my individuality – letting me make mistakes, letting me learn from them and giving me the gift of experience. It let me believe in myself and my dreams – to be myself. this quote inspired me to stand for the values and beliefs that I hold true. But it also helped me discover the real me. The “me” that was lost somewhere. It allowed me to celebrate myself appreciating and honouring “me” for my gifts and talents along with all my flaws and shortcomings. It made me more aware and confident and helped me grow as a person. It did need a lot of efforts and it was daunting and confusing at the same time, but figuring out my truest essence has made my life more meaningful, enlightening and fulfilling.

What did I learn from the quote?

And it was then I came to realize, there are all these ideals about what is perfect and what is beautiful and what is smart, but the most appealing thing is, that which is “me” is nobody else. I am “special” indeed in my own way and I am going to live that way. And this blog, my friends, is the result of discovering my true self, where I truly embody my truest essence, setting myself free, feeling liberated and spreading the word. Don’t forget to follow the other two quotes.

I would like to thank the very kind and humble Jena Pendarvis for introducing me to and nominating for The Quote Challenge. It is really fun being a part of this challenge where we get to discover new bloggers. Thank you, love, for this amazing opportunity. Please pay a visit to her blog to check out her stories.

Rules of the Quote Challenge

1) Thank the person who nominated you

2) Write three consecutive quotes for three days (one quote per day)

3) Nominate three new bloggers each day for the challenge

My Nominees

1) The Blessed Rangels

2) These are our dreams

3) EsurtLife

I hope you all have fun playing along!


Mrs. Sunshine

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